That position cannot be comfortable.
However, it is the perfect picture of what I was starting to feel about my book clubs.
Did you note the “s” on the end of “clubs”? Yes, I had very definitely overextended myself.
Seems impossible, right? That a lover of books could read too much. That’s not really the issue, and I didn’t even know it.
There as an incident, my 49th birthday, which made me decide that I was going to be the genuine me. I am outgoing, laugh inappropriately loud very often, speak my mind, and am unapologetically opinionated. While all of that seems very fun to me, it can be a bit much for some. Especially if you life in a very small, Mayberry-esque town, as I do.
Long, personal, and probably boring story made short: I quit most of my group activities for a hearty evaluation of what my goals are in terms of group settings. My book clubs, of course, fall into that category.
One book club meets weekly, and we read a book-per-week. One club meets every other month, to discuss a common book. I also like to participate in an online book club which schedules a new book each week.
Taking a little break from these has been very easy, much to my surprise. Last week, when I finished a book, I opened my library to choose the next one and realized that I could choose any book I wanted. My choice was not dictated by what one of my various reading groups had scheduled. You can’t imagine the feeling of relief I had. It was shocking to me that I was so relieved to be able to choose my own book.
Needless to say, this was quite a revelation. So, instead of the reader in the chair at the top, doing what she loves, but not quite how she wants to do it, I am doing like I like it.